Ctrl+Alt+delete for my work computer so I can go straight to password input.
Space for my home computer.
I haven't seen it posted here yet so I'd like to add one of my favorites, Big Fish.
I used to work pest control and in addition to treating your cat for fleas you can treat your home with this. Follow the directions on the label and vacuum at least once a day while you are still seeing fleas. I've used this in my own home before and keep some around just in case.
Amazing thing about snakes is that they reproduce spontaneously. They have both male and female sex organs. That’s why somebody you don’t trust you call a snake. How can you trust a guy who can literally go fuck themselves?
I found a YouTube channel that discusses philosophy called Einzelgänger about a year ago and it helped change my whole perspective on life. I get stressed a lot less frequently now, but when am stressed listening to his videos calms me down better than anything else ever has. I've bought and read many of the books he talks about and look forward to buying new ones. My favorite authors so far are Arthur Schopenhauer and Albert Camus. I also recommend Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, the Tao-te Ching by Lao Tzu, and anything from Seneca or Epictetus.
He was born the smallest in the litter but ended up with the largest ears.
I can't say for sure this is the same one but I'd like to think that it is. It's in the same area as where I found it. This is a picture of one of three fledglings I found running around with one of the parents.
When my parents had a vegetable garden they hung up those tin foil pie pans and it kept most of the birds away.
Discombobulated. The first time I heard it, an old man I worked with had used it and I gave him shit for it because I thought he had made it up. I still laugh about that sometimes
It's cobra's mist you trole twu
This is one of the parents
One of the parents was running around the drain making a bunch of noise, went to investigate and found the baby trapped inside. I fished it out with a hair net wrapped around a coat hanger that I taped to a broom handle.
Looks like one I found a few weeks ago 
This is the first time I've seen it and I'm not sure what it means. Thanks in advance
Here's a YouTube video about this that's pretty informative.