what that means is just that i want ppl to be aware that this pattern has happened in the past and of course the forces behind those happenings haven’t just disappeared. i think pride in being ND and the fact that “neurodiverse” is a word that is created by its own community are powerful reasons to doubt that the word will have the same fate. perhaps i would call this a “call to awareness” post rather than a call to action.

(making this disclaimer because a couple people are violently adamant that i am just trying to make an argument saying all these words are the same and predicting the future, which, sorry you got that impression it’s not true. but now you know!)

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[–] Wirlocke@lemmy.blahaj.zone 37 points 6 days ago (1 children)

If I'm not mistaken, all those other terms were imposed on people not really self described.

I think neurodivergent will survive because people can proud to be neurodivergent. It's closer to an identity than a prescriptive label.

I for one am proud to be neurodivergent.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 10 points 6 days ago

I think neurodivergent will survive because people can proud to be neurodivergent.

💪💪i share your hope. having pride in your identity is a powerful thing. ❤️

[–] beefbot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 24 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Idk. I can’t agree to the game being played here bc all they have to do is say it with that sneering condescension and then it’s a slur.

I’m gonna take a page from gay people, because I am a gay person. Remember before it was a slur attempt it meant HAPPY and we fucking TOOK it from them. We took a word thateant something GOOD and they can’t ever have it back. Fuck them.

So fuck em again. I’m not divergent. I’m … idk. People who can do what I can do are “NORMAL”, or “NATURAL”. Aww, you have problems learning about things you like and talking about them? You can’t write code or understand logic puzzles? Why can’t you keep up huh?? Why can’t you memorise things or babble for an hour on command, what’s wrong with you? Well not everyone can be NORMAL. 🤟🖕

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 3 points 6 days ago

hell yeah. fuck that grim reaper and his game. fully support reclamation.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (4 children)

Idk im Autistic and I use "regarded", neurotypicals can fuck off if they feel offended

[–] transhetwarrior@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (2 children)

The r-slur is targeted at intellectually disabled people. It's not something for you to reclaim. When people call non-intellectually disabled autistic people that, the insult is that they're comparing them to intellectually disabed people.

[–] Malfeasant@lemm.ee 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

And why is it an insult? Because nobody wants to be seen as intellectually disabled. No matter what new words we make up, mean people will always use them to make other people feel bad. It's not the words, it's the ideas behind them.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 2 points 6 days ago

You’re on the right track, but there’s more to it. It’s not just that people “don’t want” to be disabled—though that’s true for many. The deeper issue is how society devalues disabled lives, shaped by capitalism and white supremacist systems that teach us disabled people are less worthy, less productive, and less human.

Consider the insult “you are a woman” a few decades ago. Sure, it worked because the man didn’t want to be a woman, aligning with your point. But it was also powerful because women were treated as inferior, denied rights, and subjected to violence. The insult carried misogyny—it didn’t just say “you’re not a man,” it implied “you’re part of a group society actively devalues and mistreats.”

The same applies to ableist insults. It’s not just about not wanting to be disabled; the insult works because it taps into the belief that disabled people are lesser. That’s the real harm—society’s systemic dehumanization of disability, which gives these insults their weight.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 2 points 6 days ago

excellent and fair analysis.

[–] Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Why "regarded"? I don't get it tbh. To me it just says that you want to call someone "retarded" but you're just too much of a coward to commit. Like, it communicates the exact same contempt for someone's cognitive abilities but also an aversion to using a proper No-No Word™ because you don't wanna transgress some sorta social taboo against them while doing so. Cuck behaviour, ngl chief.

[–] Malfeasant@lemm.ee 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Or, it might be because some communities silence those who use certain words, regardless of context, and this person is trying to avoid that...

[–] Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Yes, and I still think that shitlordy behaviour of "teehee I didn't technically break the rules-as-written despite it being blatantly obvious to everyone around that my intent was to do exactly that because I'm scared of getting a comment removed on the internet" is a pathetic display of weakness.

Idk, I find all three alternatives preferable: either say the slur we all know you mean and just cop the consequences, be more creative with your insult game, or idk, maybe just don't use cognitive impairments as a punching bag???

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 3 points 6 days ago

honestly i support more shaming of this kind of behavior. i can even identify areas where this would have been more rhetorically effective in my own experiences.

instead of getting defensive: “what do you mean by that?” “no no i don’t understand please explain what ‘acoustic’ means?” “what is restarted?”

unserious ableists deserve unserious conversations

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

So brave

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

i’m not against you reclaiming slurs!, if that language is accepted in your communities and you aren’t using it to do value judgments or insult, this is totally slay and acceptable 🙂

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Of course I wouldnt say it if it made a neurodivergant person uncomfortable. Also I say it in a ironic sence to describe how people often treat me and other Autistic people as disabled.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 3 points 6 days ago

based! and pretty much what i was assuming given the rest of your comment. :) i just had to put all those qualifications there because otherwise some other user would come in screaming “hypocrisy” 😆 cheers!

[–] manicdave@feddit.uk 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Ian Dury had it right in 1981

https://youtu.be/UKnBgJG9A8E

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 2 points 6 days ago

okay lets FUCKING go i dont know why your comment took so long to show up for me but this rocks! 🔥

i love music that does this reclaiming. very cool and and a pretty effective middle finger to the would-be treadmillers. here’s another one that i love: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cdNn_duX4bE

[–] buttfarts@lemy.lol 6 points 6 days ago

Is it no longer alright for me to be retarded anymore?

[–] regul@lemm.ee 55 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

OP, at a certain point there has to be a word to describe what is happening. Just because someone uses it in a derogatory manner doesn't mean that you have to abandon the word or that every usage of it is derogatory.

See: gay

Alternatively, make a third meme about it on a niche Internet forum.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

We understand that. Tell society that. We're not exactly the march in the street crowd so when we get yelled at we go back to the corner and think of a new name.

[–] inv3r5ion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Maybe don’t go back in the corner? You need to learn to stand up for yourself otherwise you’ll just be bullied for the rest of your life.

Not just you, anyone with this attitude.

Oh boo fucking hoo they’re mean to you? Be even meaner.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Or we could just not be mean.

[–] inv3r5ion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

And let people walk all over you and then complain about being the victim. Mean people don’t deserve kindness, they deserve the same energy they’re giving out.

Taking the high road doesn’t work.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

It's not kindness, it's nothing. They don't need to be in my life. I don't need to be in their establishment. My mean quota for my life is already full.

[–] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago (2 children)

The sad reality is that people will always be mean.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

Then they can be mean to someone else. I don't have the time to deal with that in my life.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 2 points 6 days ago

honestly i love being mean. especially to people who have been mean to me.

but! it’s trivial when i’m mean to use insults that don’t implicate the identity of disabled people or other marginalized groups

cc @Maggoty@lemmy.world @inv3r5ion@lemmy.dbzer0.com

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Just because someone uses it in a derogatory manner doesn’t mean that you have to abandon the word or that every usage of it is derogatory.

I never said that anyone should abandon the word?!? In fact, I would far prefer reclaiming of slurs that reempowers the disabled community with their own language. But you didn’t know that because instead of asking you jumped to an entirely different topic.

This is you right now.

[–] regul@lemm.ee 1 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I see you went with option two lol.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe -1 points 6 days ago

go away troll 🥱

[–] knightly@pawb.social 19 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It's the Euphemism Treadmill

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/euphemism_treadmill

[–] metaStatic@kbin.earth 8 points 6 days ago

Funny thing is the neurodivergent aren't the ones running on that treadmill.

It literally doesn't matter what you change the word to, that's the new word I'm calling my friend when he does something incredibly stupid.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 3 points 6 days ago

Hijacking this comment to say: I don’t even think the word should be abandoned. That’s an assumption that rugul totally made up.

My aim in posting is to be descriptive, showing the pattern of behavior, rather than perscriptive. I’m not telling anyone what to do or say other than “hey, be aware of how this tends to happen!”

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 34 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

More than half of those are outdated jargon words from when standard procedure to "cure" ND people (and other undesirables) was lobotomies. They were not claimed.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

Yeah, but it holds true for the later ones.

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago (3 children)

"Neurodivergent" is a bit different though. The r-word says something normative about people's mental development. It's saying that the person has been prevented from being normal; that something is wrong with them. "Special needs" indicates that someone requires different resources than what is typical. Much like IQ when it was developed, it's a way to sort people's needs on an economic basis, which isn't poorly intentioned. However, it still labels people by how we need certain things within our socioeconomic system.

Disorder classification systems like the DSM or ICD seek to normalize people, making sure we "function" in society. It measures us by a set of standards to ensure that we can live independently with our environment. It is very much defined by how society is structured; the environment of industrial capitalism. It doesn't matter how fulfilling your life is, only that you are a functional cog.

"Neurodivergence" seeks to avoid the pathology based approach. It says nothing about us having disorders. It instead focuses on us as different and divergent from the norm, but not inherently ill because of who we are. It's invariant to economic systems or cultural norms, only saying that we are different.

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[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Acoustic?

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

IDK, but I saw that being used within autistic communities first. At least for a while, which would explain this meme.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 1 points 6 days ago

Yeah, it was sadly a very quick development/devolvement from “cutesy term used by the ASD community” to “swap-in for the r-slur used by 99% of gen z internet.” something like a matter of months.

[–] Cattypat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Maybe you dont hear this in your circles but in my (younger) cohort it is ALL OVER THE PLACE and has been used against me in a derogatory manner

[–] Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago

Idk, I think it's gone out of fashion atp, but it was super annoying.

[–] FoxyFerengi@lemm.ee 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I feel like the same people who use "acoustic" also use "regarded"

[–] Cattypat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I've heard that as well as restarted

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 6 days ago

Or “it’s started” due to the Black Eyed Peas!

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