being secretive for no reason
You're not being secretive for no reason. You're being secretive to avoid harassment from someone you care about. Seems like they don't really return the favour, they just make fun of you.
this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
51 points (91.8% liked)
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I used to have a friend like that in high school and life significantly improved when I decided to change friend groups.
You are not describing a "friend".
You mistyped "bully" as "friend"
What exactly makes this person a "friend?"
This is not a healthy friendship. This person does not have your best interests at heart. Distance yourself. Stop hanging out, stop messaging. Give excuses if you're not comfortable telling them that you won't tolerate their treatment of you anymore. Do not let them guilt you into staying in each other's lives. They might see you push them away and try everything they can to pull you back in. Don't give in. Real friends like to see you happy and want to build your confidence up. Go to events where people have similar interests to you and you will make better friends. Good luck!
Your friend is making you insecure for just being yourself. He is a manipulative bully, not your friend.
Sounds like you need to distance yourself from this individual. They are not your friend.
A normal friendship does not leave you anxious or scared of their reactions no matter what you are up to, however private you want to be or how little time you spend with them. You don't have to agree on everything or enjoy everything the same way. A friend is someone whos company you enjoy from time to time. But have no obligation to please or requirement to spend time with.
Posting private information about you on the internet sounds very bad. I'd ask them to refrain from that. Escalate that to relevant authoity if it doesn't stop.
This is not the behavior of a friend.
It's not normal behavior at all in any way.
I beg to differ. If I were a c-word, this behavior would be par for the course.
Okay, so: is it because you reasonably expect that from your friend? Have they given you reason to expect these things? Or is it more just an anxiety thing? Like, you know it's not a reasonable fear, but your brain still won't let go?
If A: no, that's not normal and he's hella toxic. Especially the online anonymity thing- what the fuck?
If B: no, that's not exactly normal but anxiety is a bitch sometimes.
Simply put: no that is not normal. That person is not really your friend.
In your heart I think you know the answer or you wouldn’t be posting here like this. No, it’s not normal or healthy. That person is not a friend, and he seems dangerous to be around (maybe not for physical reasons but definitely for mental reasons).
Continue to be secretive and distance yourself from him; that’s not asshole behavior, that’s self-preservation. I hope you are able to separate yourself and get free from this person and in time find actual friends who care and support you for who you are.
Do not associate with people who treat you this way.
Your friends should love to see you geek out over the stuff that makes you happy.
This doesn't sound like a friendship I would want.
There's this saying: those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.
That's a great saying, gonna save that!
This is not a friend. You can do better. And should start now
You owe them nothing. Cut them out of your life. You don't even need to explain
No. And these sound like trauma reactions.
Yeah that's abuse.
No. Nothing normal about that, or healthy. That's not your friend, either. Drop that dude like a hot potato.
Your "friend" sounds like they're due for at least one brick to the ribs. You deserve better, dude. Get that loser out of your life!