this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2023
1735 points (98.6% liked)

Programmer Humor

32724 readers
134 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 351 points 1 year ago (6 children)

I laughed and my partner ask why. I told her it’s some really nerdy humor. She was fine not hearing the joke, but I loosely explained it anyway. She humored me anyway. She’s a good woman.

[–] pythonoob@programming.dev 96 points 1 year ago (3 children)

God my wife would just stare at me and then go on with her previous conversation.

[–] victron@programming.dev 29 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

My wife would just kiss me so I stfu

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] dot20@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago
[–] jelloeater85@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago
[–] ParsnipWitch@feddit.de 38 points 1 year ago

My boyfriend is completely technically illiterate haha. But he's such a good boy otherwise

[–] Moc@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I too think your partner is a good woman

[–] NoIWontPickaName@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago (10 children)

I don't understand this partner thing.

Idk why, it just bothers me to hear someone say that instead of girl/boyfriend or Significant Other.

It just sounds so damn clinical.

That said, I also choose this person's partner.

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 37 points 1 year ago (3 children)

To me, partner seems so much less clinical than "significant other".

Partner is good because it says nothing about gender, which is good if your partner does not conform to a gender binary, but also just if you don't want to reveal their gender either to prevent people being weirdos about it—like they often can online, especially if you say it's your "girlfriend"—or to protect yourself if, for example, you're in a same-sex relationship. But it also says nothing too specific about the status of your relationship. Are they your girlfriend? Fiancée? Wife? Something less conventional? If it's not important to the story, why not leave that detail out?

[–] spauldo@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had a partner when I opened a computer shop back in the day. Closest I've come to having sex with him was the time I saw his wife topless through the window.

Significant Other is much more specific.

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 year ago

It's also much weirder sounding. You know what sort of partner they mean from context (same as you know if someone means girlfriend girlfriend or a friend that is a girl)

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Some languages - specifically Norwegian that I know of, don't have separate words for "boyfriend" and "girlfriend". In Norwegian we have the word "kjæreste" which can be directly translated to "dearest". To me it always feels a little weird to use "boyfriend" or "girlfriend", i guess the same could be true for other non-native english speakers.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 year ago

Dearest is nice. I'm going to share that with my kjæreste.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Moc@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My fiancé asked me to start calling her partner because she was sick of being called girlfriend after 8 years

[–] Deebster@lemmy.ml 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When you get married you can call her your ex-girlfriend

[–] Moc@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thanks I’m stealing this

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Because she's a woman and not a girl? (don't shoot me, im not english native. But Partnerin is the same)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] scubbo@lemmy.ml 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (5 children)

Personally I (a straight person) use it in an attempt to normalize the term, so that people who want to conceal the gender of their partner have plausible deniability. If all straight people say "girlfriend/boyfriend", then anyone saying "partner" is outed as "a non-straight person trying to conceal the fact".

EDIT: but also, it connotes a deeper level of trust, support, intimacy, etc. A "girlfriend" is some chick I fool around and have some fun with; a "partner" is someone with whom I'm building a life together.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] can@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Some old nuts don't like to hear that I've been living with my girlfriend for years.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 14 points 1 year ago

She's literally the person in this meme

[–] cybermass@lemmy.ca 8 points 1 year ago

Gotta keep that one around

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] UnverifiedAPK@lemmy.ml 127 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's like that guy that posted an example Bitcoin miner on GitHub, then a bunch of script kiddies forgot to change his wallet info for their own before deploying... He made a good chunk of change by doing nothing malicious.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 23 points 1 year ago
[–] douglasg14b@lemmy.world 101 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

So, essentially, really poorly written malware? Given the number of assumptions it makes without any sort of robustness around system configuration it's about as good as any first-pass bash script.

It'd be a stretch to call it malware, it's probably an outright fabrication to call it a virus.

[–] DrinkBoba@lemmy.world 119 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is.. clearly a meme..

[–] Knusper@feddit.de 32 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I wasn't sure about it either. There's security researchers out there who might genuinely want to get a virus to run in a VM.

But yeah, the cmalw-lib-2.0 gives it away...

[–] BloodSlut@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, nobody uses cmalw-lib-2.0

Its deprecated, now we use hack-lib-client-1.17

[–] deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

systemd-malwared and its front-end malctl are how the cool kids are doing it.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wasn’t sure about it either

It ends with them donating money to the malware's creator...

[–] Knusper@feddit.de 6 points 1 year ago

Yes, that is odd, but not impossible either. I've seen influencers do dumb shit like that for the attention.

[–] excel@lemmy.megumin.org 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

So you’re saying it’s about as robust as a typical Linux application then?

[–] Revolutionary_Pi@lemm.ee 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 year ago

He said the thing!

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Packagers job to make it fit their distro, innit?

[–] GentooPhysicist@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (4 children)

As a package maintainer, it's a lot of fun sometimes!

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] makingStuffForFun@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 year ago

I think it was a fun post about what we go through sometimes just to get X or Y working. It was quite clever.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] merthyr1831@lemmy.world 77 points 1 year ago (2 children)

if youre gonna write linux malware at least distribute it as a flatpak ffs

[–] OtakuAltair@lemm.ee 16 points 1 year ago

Scammers these days lack basic courtesy 🤦‍♂️

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Cabrio@lemmy.world 77 points 1 year ago
[–] NatoBoram@lemm.ee 65 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Should've written the malware in Go, smh

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] spez@sh.itjust.works 41 points 1 year ago

A system bestowed upon us by gods.

[–] vsis 36 points 1 year ago

Sorry, folks. Using cmalw-lib is now deprecated.

Cool kids are using systemd-malwd

[–] Zozano@aussie.zone 31 points 1 year ago

I guess the process could be regarded as gain of function research.

[–] schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de 28 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] chinpokomon@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago

Even if it were inspired, it is significantly different the way it's written. I've hit these same challenges before, so I'm more inclined to think it is independent discovery.

[–] LogarithmicCamel@feddit.uk 7 points 1 year ago

The newer one is a lot funnier though.

[–] ram@feddit.nl 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

This reminds me of the old linux hater's blog post "At least we don't have any viruses".

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That certainly was a blog with many emotions. Coming at this with no context, it looks like the kind of content that would be beautiful satire, except it's probably not.

[–] ram@feddit.nl 7 points 1 year ago

Linux Hater's Blog was half satire and half honest criticism.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] lemmy@lemmy.stonansh.org 15 points 1 year ago

i laughed so hard 😂 😂 😂

load more comments
view more: next ›