this post was submitted on 12 Dec 2024
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    What distro did you say you use? (midwest.social)
    submitted 2 weeks ago by snpzrik@midwest.social to c/linuxmemes@lemmy.world
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    [–] TheDemonBuer@lemmy.world 88 points 2 weeks ago (10 children)

    Pfft, Linux users don't date. We're all virginal, paranoid shut-ins.

    [–] josefo@leminal.space 52 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    The trick is securing a marriage before using Linux, if try the other way around it doesn't work.

    [–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 31 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

    Shortly after getting my steam deck and seriously learning Linux past tiny personal servers, I got divorced

    [–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago

    I know correlation ≠ causation, but I really want to believe your relationship was ruined because your wife was sneaking out in the middle of the night to use Windows

    [–] z3rOR0ne@lemmy.ml 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

    I don't know. I'm pretty sure one of the many ways you can end a marriage is installing Gentoo and saying "I'm just gonna go and compile my kernel." to your significant other, then go to your computer and just never be heard from again.

    [–] lime@feddit.nu 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
    [–] Marthirial@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

    Can confirm this works. Windows user thru single life. Married, switched to Linux on my laptop. Now separated and life in ruins but a smile always sneaks in booting up Kubuntu.

    [–] TimeSquirrel@kbin.melroy.org 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

    That's what Anthrocon is for. Once a year is enough.

    [–] pixelscript@lemm.ee 6 points 2 weeks ago

    And if that isn't enough, I know a few good dakimakura shops.

    [–] superkret@feddit.org 16 points 2 weeks ago

    I don't date because women are proprietary.
    You can share them with the community, but you can't modify and use them in any way you like.

    [–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Yeah, ikr? My wife won't even bang me, and I'm fairly sure it's part of a global conspiracy to make my balls explode

    [–] superkret@feddit.org 13 points 2 weeks ago

    sudo touch wife

    southsamurai isn't in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported.

    [–] bumbali@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 1 week ago

    i have the same situation. i figured i could have sex with someone else then, but other women seem to also know i use linux because nobody else will bang me either. and i doubt it's my looks, mom says i'm handsome, so it has to be the linux stuff.

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    I dated and married.

    I love the story of how I met my now-wife. It was on IRC. When I was trying to start to meet women, I never would have guessed that that would be how I met my future wife.

    [–] pmarcilus@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    A keeper, and u should be a good husband to her.

    Btw, let me fetch some grasses outside first

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

    I'm not sure I'm succeeding, but I'm trying hard to be good to her. She's the best person I know.

    Last time I touched grass, I hyperextended my already injured ankle. I'm super tentative about that kind of thing now.

    [–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 week ago

    A lot of us are also disaster trans lesbians :3

    [–] ThrowawayPermanente@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 weeks ago

    The types for significant others and distros hash to the same location in the table, it's just bad luck and there's nothing we can do about it.

    [–] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 3 points 1 week ago

    Deep_in_ the basement, amirite?

    [–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    Hey. I go outside every now and then...

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

    We should hang out.

    But, like ... Inside.

    [–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 weeks ago

    And this meme here is showing one of the reasons why