this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2024
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How can i annoy my stupid bitch boss? (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Today@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
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I work in a public school district and i visit about a dozen different schools. Bosses are making us share our calendars, thinking they'll be able to track us and catch us doing something wrong. I'm planning to add "started my period" every couple of weeks. Are there other good outlook tricks to fuck with them?

ETA- This is my work calendar, not my personal calendar. I know that seems reasonable but it's being done as a petty micromanagement tactic. There are about 20 of us in my department who drive from school to school every day working with kids with physical disabilities. They don't just want to know when we're in meetings - they want every minute of our day to be accounted for - 8 to 830 school A, 840 to 11 school B, etc. I go to 14 schools. If my kid at school A is absent or if i get a call from school J that i need to stop by to fix a wheelchair, am I supposed to pull over and update my calendar so they can find me? I could spend an hour a day in parking lots editing my calendar. Most days i eat lunch in my car between schools. Last year they made a rule that we can't carry to-go cups because it looks like we have enough free time to drive thru Starbucks. It's just to be controlling.

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[–] Pudutr0n 118 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (6 children)
  • Spam personal fake notes everywhere. "Joey's little league game", "Call dentist" and make completely useless ones like "remember the thing" for maximum annoyance.
  • Add obscure religious holidays and random countries' national festivities. "Bhutan Losar day. Get decorations."
  • Put in washed up celebrities' birthdays "David Hasselhoff's b-day".
  • Include random bad album release anniversaries. "18 year release anniversary of Kid Rock - Live Trucker".
  • Register inaccurate astrological milestones with random advice. "Leo ascending in Pluto. Good day for new beginnings".
  • Every once in a while add events that are just random characters such as "HERDBhbcdbcnn nnnnnnnn" which you can later claim were added accidentally from your pocket.
  • Make sure some of the events are written IN ALL CAPS
  • Be lavish with your use of exclamation marks!!!!!1!!111
  • Occasionally add reviews of your day scheduled for a few hours later as if using the calendar as a diary, including details about health conditions and sex life. "Rough day today.. had a lot of work and didn't want to get frisky because of the hemmorhoids"
  • Write down random math calculations here and there that suggest you are confusing the calendar with an excel spreadsheet "=27.5/3"
  • Include the most bland and sad motivational quotes every couple of days with several typos as if written ina rush: "YO cndo it!!!" "YOU WILL ALEAYS BE BEeeTIFUL, gril. Ownit!!!"
  • Add fake Google search queries as if confusing the calendar with your search bar "cheap viernamese restaurant charlottesville" "how dolphins swim so fast ND jump"

Extra bonus points if you can invite him to the "events" and get the calendar to send him push notifications for occasional 5:30 am "wake up early for the thing". If he accuses you of bad faith for inviting him, tell him it's the default and you keep forgetting to remove him.

Not only will this annoy him, it will render the system impossible to supervise and you can always claim you ALWAYS organize your personals through your calendar and this "is just how i organize".

Good luck and give em hell.

Edit: Elaborated and more ideas

Edit 2: Few more ideas.

[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You are petty and disagreeable to overreaching management, I love you.

[–] Pudutr0n 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Best part is, public school teachers are basically unfireable in most parts of the developed western world for anything short of Child endangerment, so they probably can get away with all of this and more. :D

Ily2

[–] Today@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

Yeah. Worst I'll get is probably an email.

[–] Today@lemmy.world 35 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I love these! Thank you! When we take a personal day we now have to invite her to it in our calendar. I think I'll be taking some extremely personal days.

[–] Pudutr0n 14 points 2 months ago

Beautiful! Godspeed, brave soul.

[–] TheFriar@lemm.ee 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

That’s fuckin insane. Who is this turd

I assume this is a byproduct of politicizing school leadership positions?

[–] Pudutr0n 2 points 2 months ago

Misunderstood your comment. My apologies!! <3

[–] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This was a fantastic read. OP I hope you do this (and then tell us about it or post screenshots)

[–] Pudutr0n 15 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Thank you. I consider myself a decent managerial saboteur / supervisional terrorist

Some people might take this further like spamming tech support/ IT with nonsensical tickets that somehow end up being something brought up to management which would force them to determine some policy (which they hate doing)

Others might find it amusing to open debates about how certain harmless terminology used in calendar events may cause offense to "people we should be looking after" due to "ideological considerations" "possibly triggering" even if no relevant members of any group are in the team. Some people may bring this up in HR.

The key concepts to destroy any organizational effort are "techincally allowed", "plausible deniability" and "could get someone in a lot of trouble".

[–] voracitude@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

IT here, please don't drag us into this... unless you're looking for help. We enjoy malicious compliance just as much as anyone else.

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)
  • Put in washed up celebrities' birthdays "David Hasselhoff's b-day".
  • Include random bad album release anniversaries. "18 year release anniversary of Kid Rock - Live Trucker".

Make sure they're correct though, shitty boss is bound to share your love for kid rock and the hoff.

[–] Saber_is_dead@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

David Hasselhoff's b-day

July 17, for your convenience

[–] Nomad@infosec.pub 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget to use tasks too. Spams your bosses task list with random stuff and reminders all the time.

[–] Today@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Nice! I didn't know that!

[–] Today@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Remember the thing! 🤣🤣