this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2024
1135 points (99.0% liked)

Programmer Humor

19623 readers
411 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 239 points 5 months ago (21 children)

and god help you if you ever use any of them, obviously you have time to play games you don't have enough work to do. It's all for show.

I remember a Meta recruiter reached out to me. We had a couple of talks, and then on one of them I asked "So how's the work life balance"

Oh it's great! We have a 24/7 cafeteria here, so if you ever need a snack it's always available. We have sleeping pods, so you can easily sleep, and even 24/7 laundry services, so it's all around a very relaxing place.

Uhhh yeah man. I'm not some kid fresh out of college. I own a home, and I'm very aware of my work time vs my personal time. Hard pass all around. Kids, if the company sounds too good to be true, there's an ulterior motive. Those things sound super great..... but they're of course all meant to keep you working around the clock, meeting deadlines. The companies aren't "hip" or "cool", it's all to attract you, and then work you to the bone. A strict 40 hour work week is better than foosball anyday.

I know I'm preaching to the choir but for the people interviewing for their first software gig - well maybe one of them will read this.

[–] _sideffect@lemmy.world 73 points 5 months ago (3 children)

I agree with work life balance, but working at meta for 2-3 years for $300k might be worth the sacrifice

[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 62 points 5 months ago (3 children)

If I were a kid right out of college, I'd honestly consider it. The key is truly knowing what you're getting into. Companies gobble up those kids out of college because they're naiive, and they want to prove themselves. MAANG knows that and take advantage of it. As long as you're aware of that going into it, and plan to use them too, then go for it. Just don't plan to be a lifer, know that they don't care about you going in.

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 51 points 5 months ago (1 children)

MAANG

deadname the pricks, you're already doing it for google. it's facebook

[–] key@lemmy.keychat.org 15 points 5 months ago (3 children)

MAAAN would be a much better acronym though

[–] boydster@sh.itjust.works 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

That's just, like, your opinion...

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 10 points 5 months ago

Get in with the full idea of being a parasite, doing the barest minimum work possible while getting friendly with higher ups. It's not like doing a good job there would be better for the customers/end users anyway

[–] 100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

MAANG sounds like a Superman's villain

[–] bandwidthcrisis@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

I thought that it became MANGA when it changed from FAANG?

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 24 points 5 months ago (3 children)

$300k might be worth the sacrifice

Right? I realistically just need 150k/yr to be stable in my area, I could chuck the other 150k/yr into savings and quit after 3 years with 450k in the bank

[–] fruitycoder@sh.itjust.works 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

If I rember right google had an AI driving division that had huge cash incentives based on performance metrics that essentially crashed and burned because they hit targets so fast that main time retired for life in like a year or two

[–] BalooWasWahoo@links.hackliberty.org 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

That sounds interesting, seeing as I am 'somewhat' familiar with google's self driving car program right now, and very little about it is crashing or burning.

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 2 points 5 months ago

Self-driving probably was not the one successful AI program

[–] 100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 4 points 5 months ago

3 years can be a very long time, though.

[–] MonkderDritte@feddit.de 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

The hell? I live two years for 100k CHF. Lucerne, Switzerland, flat in the historic, more expensive part.

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 16 points 5 months ago

My soul is worth more than that, and I don't even have one.

[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 39 points 5 months ago (3 children)

My office has two ping pong tables. They're literally roped off with caution tape, and nobody is allowed to use them. I wish I were kidding.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 5 months ago

Jesus, it's like a cargo cult.

Also, happy cake day. Death to Reddit.

[–] SomeGuy69@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

Make a photo. Great meme potential

[–] SurpriZe@lemm.ee 3 points 5 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Karyoplasma@discuss.tchncs.de 28 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The companies aren't "hip" or "cool"

I believe the industry term is "agile".

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Nah that just means they can't plan for shit and are constantly fighting fires.

[–] Midnitte@beehaw.org 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

They're looking for a volume icon ninja-pirate-wizard, who takes no prisoners. They work hard and play hard ~~so get ready for your boss to be overly demanding and drunk~~.

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 6 points 5 months ago

a rockstar is who they want

The hiring person says they want a rock star developer, the candidate trashes everything and shoots heroin, HR responds"he's good"

[–] GissaMittJobb@lemmy.ml 11 points 5 months ago

Those things sound super great..... but they're of course all meant to keep you working around the clock, meeting deadlines.

This is not going to be universally true at all big tech-companies. There are places with perfectly reasonable WLB on top of huge salaries and fantastic perks.

These places are usually big enough that you're going to see extremes on both ends within the same company - some departments with huge deadline pressure cultures, and some with highly relaxed work settings. It can be a bit of a gamble.

[–] Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I know I'm preaching to the choir but for the people interviewing for their first software gig

First software gig? In this market, take whatever to get experience imo.

But that second/third/etc job? Culture, then salary, then everything else. Last interview I went to bragged about giving everyone brand new sneakers yet pay $25k less than average.

[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] experbia@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Money can be exchanged for goods and services

[–] experbia@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

aww, goods and services... I wanted money.

[–] Head@lemmings.world 8 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (5 children)

We've got free local artisan coffee, organic fruit, mineral water, and beer. We turn the kitchen table into a ping pong table with a net after lunch for however long people want to use it and people do. At 17:00 everyone's got a beer on their desk and by 18:00 the doors are locked and the lights are out. One Thursday a month the table is used for beer pong after work and we play card games like Exploding Kittens. Idk I like it here.

Not everywhere sucks. I've never worked an hour over my full-time requirements (ever), I get unlimited sick leave and no one shames me for missing a week as long as I call in properly. 31 Vacation days and company parties are nice too, plus paid travel time and nice hotel rooms. Also I've never made more money in my life and we're all getting extra bonuses to cover the unexpected inflation.

Oh and I can work from home four days a week if I want to. Gotta come in that one day, but it's a fifteen minute walk from my house so that's just fine for me. I come in on Tuesdays because that's when the company orders lunch for everyone (just one day a week but still cool).

[–] SpaceCadet@feddit.nl 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

At 17:00 everyone’s got a beer on their desk and by 18:00 the doors are locked and the lights are out. One Thursday a month the table is used for beer pong after work and we play card games like Exploding Kittens.

I'd rather go home at 17:00 and do all those things with my real friends, or you know, spend some quality time with my partner.

[–] silasmariner@programming.dev 2 points 5 months ago

Plenty of my real friends are people I used to work with back before I was married and stopped getting as much out of this sort of culture.. There doesn't need to be some hard line here - just because you work with people doesn't mean you can't be friends

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I envy you a bit. On the other hand, I have conditions that are at least okay, so I probably wouldn't trade places because that'd be a lot of hassle searching for a nice place like yours and then trying to get into it

Just a little detail, is your company in the USA, in the EU, or elsewhere?

[–] Head@lemmings.world 2 points 5 months ago
[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 2 points 5 months ago

That sounds like a great gig! Great office life, and a ton of PTO (for American standards). Although I will say, I've been in small startups. The beer and alcohol is fun - but the startups grow. It's all fun until someone who doesn't drink joins, or someone develops a problem. Keep an eye on those two issues, about 3 of the 4 startups I've been at one of those has happened.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

Company: Provides amenities and services that would (technically) allow a person to live on premises. Pays you enough to retire early if you didn't have to bother with rent or a mortgage.

Also company: "We can't hire you without a permanent residential address."

I also worked at multiple places that had fully decked out break-rooms: free food, game consoles, VR, and 60-inch TVs. Everyone was afraid to use them for fear of looking like they were screwing around. Except the interns. They used the hell out of that stuff.

[–] Squirrel@thelemmy.club 5 points 5 months ago

My wife's job has all of those amenities, too! Well, it didn't at first, but she's been 100% WFH since covid. She's got an office with a window, cats in the workplace, lunch is brought to her straight from the kitchen, and she can even take breaks to go on walks with her family during the day.

load more comments (13 replies)