Seeing it again yeah lol

For me a lot of meltdowns feel like spiraling. Unable to communicate how I feel, feeling alone/separated, racing thoughts that run the gamete from anxious to depressing. Typically I want to reach out and connect to someone but I can't and that makes it worse somehow. It's scary to deal with especially as a lot of it feels so irrational yet it has a real impact.

Oshi no Ko S2 has been satisfying so far. This has been a really bleh season of anime overall for me. Heavy fan service and/or a step away from outright hentai will keep me from watching something and this summer has felt like a lot of fetishy stuff. And since most shows revolve around teens I just can't watch that stuff.

Nice debunked conspiracy theories pushed by the GOP to vilify the 'other'. I'd say try harder but you're clearly a tool of the fascists.

No experience with that book, but a lot of literature has autistim coded characters. Lot, well sort of, debate in the Warhammer 40k communities about a fair number of autism coded characters there. I can't remember who all they've said since I avoid a lot of the conversations but if I remember right a fair number of Space Marines, and their 'traitor' brethren are 'autistic'.

Reanimation is soooo good. Still have my original copy of Hybrid Theory and it's great, but the edits on Reanimation just work really well. Meteora is good though their constant experimentation can make some stinkers.

As someone who has matched this description, still do but in different ways, forcing your idea of 'normal' on them isn't going to help them. It's more to make yourself feel better.

Life sucks. It's not your choice how they cope with the suck. Also that you think they'll just be able to start going on dates or whatever is laughable to me. But that's me. I empathize with your roommate in so many ways and fully hope they pack their stuff and leave instead of putting up with your 'good intentions'.

I used to use speakers, but they kind of crapped out. And limited space for the computer made it harder to have them around so I switched to headphones.

So I don't use any streaming services beyond my YouTube 'playlists' of songs that are all like 10 to 20 years old at this point. Used to use DI.fm, but they switched to a model that required a subscription to listen to the only channel I listened to which was extremely disappointing to me for a time. When it comes to physical media I love CDs and actually buy some occasionally. I know they're a 'dying media type', same with all physical media, and it makes me so sad/mad because I much prefer to have a physical copy of something I enjoy. While I don't use my CDs much they are my go to way of getting music when I am in my car.

Sorry you feel like I'm arguing with them. But people telling me to 'go see a doctor' when I've already said I don't have any money isn't helpful. I'm also not going into every single fine detail of my health here so a lot of the suggestions are just not going to work. Also people keep saying 'be positive' or whatever and I can't make people see what I've said (since it was all stuff in guild/clan discords), but I've done the 'positive' thing and it ended up the same way. Though usually the positive thing ended with me feeling more alone. So yeah I'm sorry that all of the 'long thought out helpful advice' isn't really helpful to me. I was 'arguing' with people who were clearly not reading my original post when they jumped straight to 'go spend money on a doctor/therapist'.

Dunno. If something is going, say an event is coming up, I'd say 'hey anyone want to group up and do this? We can schedule a day/time even!' and literally no one would engage with it. So it was a lot of just talking to myself.

Hah!

That's true. I've terrible experiences irl too. When I joined an LGBTQIA+ group at school they ostersiced me for saying that I personally had no issue talking to someone who had questions about the communities I fell into. Like that was a terrible thing to them so they shunned me. It was so funny because we had a room you could go to to hang out/study/chill in and when I'd walk in they'd all get up and leave. Other times I've just been furniture for the group. Like they say 'we want you here/we like you being here' but when I'd try to engage they'd just shut down. Now with COVID and no place to even try to find friends I gave up. I'm in too much pain and can't afford to go do things so yeah.