Agnostic: I don't know shit.
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Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
Pantheism: "It's all the same shit."
Naturalism: That giant deuce that you just dropped, that's the same stuff stars are made of!
Funny, but aside from that for Catholics we believe bad stuff happens because of the devil, not punishment from god
I remember the devil went from popping volcanoes and starting plagues to selling nifty magics for immortal souls. These days He's into Rock-&-Roll and Dungeons & Dragons (also LGBT+ and feminism).
I'm assuming there's a secret holy order that retroactively gives salvation to everyone, triggered by the human species goes extinct, and that's why Satan has softened His game. But that's just me.
Fudaism, eh?
tl;dr for religious texts