It's normal to feel these things when thinking about a new OS, it can be quite a big change. You can always dual-boot, at least at first. Anyone telling you that you need to fully wipe your drive and immediately start from scratch is being silly.

Part of the fun of exploring new OSes and Linux distros is experimenting with new things! You don't have to commit to a distros immediately, no one will judge you for distro-hopping! Even if you do eventually choose to go back to Windows, that's okay! And just because you're on Windows doesn't mean you can't use open-source software! Just because your OS is proprietary doesn't make using FOSS any less valid.

No one is born with intrinsic knowledge of Linux, and no one should loathe their user experience of their OS. Are you made to be a Linux user, or do you just need to tinker with your Windows install? Only you can tell, but you sound like you'd regret not at least trying out a LiveUSB of some beginner-friendly distros.

Your hardware isn't too old, in fact a new OS can often help old hardware run a lot better. Proton and WINE have made running games and Windows software on Linux easier than ever before.

Feel free to post here if you have any more questions about your potential transition 💕

This is one hell of a metaphor, well done.

OMG!! This is seriously the best and funniest egg_irl post I've ever seen! I was laughing so much while reading it! And it's even funnier seeing how many people didn't get it. Incredible post!

When I ask about my gender on StackExchange, people tell me to just use Arch, but I don't think I'm fully a trans woman?

Masterclass post my friend :) I'm sure it left many people with egg on their face!

Seeing someone newly and genuinely interested in Linux brings me so much joy. Welcome friend, I hope you enjoy your journey.

I'm not trans but I am gay so you should value my opinion at 50%.

how do you choose a distro? Do you just know, or do you have to try them all?

Pick a reputable one, use it for a long time, figure out what you like/don't like about it, and see if any distros offer alternatives. Most distros offer 95% of the same thing, and the last part is usually down to the out-of-box experience, software availability, and how stable/bleeding-edge the software availability is. I always recommend Linux Mint to get started with since it's Debian-based (wide software compatibility, stable software updates, and the most typical/"normal" type of Linux distro without any gimmicks) and has a good reputation. You can almost always customize any distro to look and feel like any other distro, and they're more similar to "preconfigured installs" than "closed-off/unique ecosystems".

Is there some place where you can try distros on for size without the trouble and risk of migrating multiple times?

Try installing and running distros in a VM, e.g. VirtualBox (I don't know what the best one for Windows is). VMs act like an emulated computer and you can get the full experience of what an install will be like and how it will look/feel without giving it any real hardware.

How do I know if Linux is right for me? How do I know Windows is wrong? If I loathe my user experience with Windows, is that the fault of Windows or just me? If Linux starts feeling comfortable, how do I know it’s because I’ve made the right choice and it’s not just inertia setting in? Does that even matter?

It depends on your values, but a lot of people simply use Linux because it is open source and community-driven, whereas Microsoft wants nothing more than to track you and give you as many ads as you'll tolerate. You can customize literally every part of Linux, and so I really like it because I'm a control freak and if I don't like the way something works I can change it. On Windows you get what you get and every year you get less tunables.

I’m at least good with Windows, but I lack the intuition of the average Linux user. Could I really master Linux the way I have Windows, or would my awkward personality relegate me to being a permanent tourist?

You'll get comfortable quickly if you use a newbie-friendly distro. Linux is different that Windows in a lot of ways but it's not always in a good way or bad way, just different. My guess is that you'll actually become much better at Linux than Windows, because Windows tries its hardest to make the computer seem like "magic" and prevent you from understanding what's going on, whereas Linux lets you open and modify anything you want and even gives you documentation on how to do it. Nothing in Linux will ever tell you "no" (so be careful!).

Is my hardware too old to start tinkering with OSs?

Linux runs on fuckin anything. Windows is like "mmmm your hardware is 4 years old sorry you can't run Windows 11!" whereas Linux is like "does it have a CPU?"

I know your choice of OS should take priority over your programs, as long as those programs aren’t vital, but I have a full Steam library and don’t look forward to losing any old friends. Can I partition my drive? Is that worth the trouble, switching from OS to OS depending on circumstances? I hear some distros these days can run some windows programs, and that you don’t have to leave your old programs behind the way you used to, but can I count on that trend continuing?

IMO partitioning drives and dual-booting can make things complicated for a new user but if you aren't sure if you want to stay you might want to do it anyway. Games run very well on Linux in general, with notable games that don't work being listed here, and specific games listed here (Gold/Platinum is good). Linux (not based on distro) is very good at running Windows programs by using a compatibility layer named "Wine", but there are notable exceptions. Generally you should try to run very few Windows programs that aren't games, and you'll have the best experience by finding open source alternatives to common programs.

Will losing touch with the Windows environment make it more difficult for me to succeed in a Windows-dominated career?

That depends on how extensively your career revolves around Windows. IMO Windows and Linux are more similar than different, and if you're just being forced to use Windows to run some normal workflows you're not going to feel any culture shock. If your career revolves around help desk or something you might lose touch with troubleshooting tips.

All that said, I think you'll find Linux easier to use than you think. Linux itself has very few actual flaws at the moment, and most of the friction is because some popular programs don't have Linux versions. Make a list of all the programs you use, see if they have Linux versions, and look for alternatives if they don't. Also make a list of all the games you want to play and check ProtonDB to see how compatible they are.

This was so well written, I am not equipped to even respond to all of your questions as I'm new to Linux myself.

Just experiment and try different distros out as you go. You also have the option to dual boot 😉

@Thevenin

Legendary post.

My first distro was Ubuntu(great for beginners but not advanced users), my second was Manjaro(horrible distro, don't give it a try), my third was Debian(one of the best distros imo) and my actual distro is Arch and i dont plan on switching again. Why i stay with Arch ? because i like the Diy and simple philosophy around it. Linux is the best choice if you don't require proprietary softwares(because they may be not compatible with Linux). Linux is not more hard than Windows to learn, it's just a different world(i switched to Linux in December 2022 so it's very recent).

You are overthinking this.

The distro you chose is important when you start to do serious things : running a web server, deploying applications for a company, etc.

At your level this is irrelevant. You want to play with Linux, get a taste of it? Install VirtualBox on your PC, create a new VM and install Linux Mint Cinnamon. Is it the best to begin with? Maybe yes, maybe no, who cares, it's one of the noob friendly distros and it is based on Ubuntu Linux (it's virtually the same minus some proprietary crap) which has TONS of documentation online, and forums filled with answers to almost any question you can think of. You run into a problem? Paste the error message in Google and a post on the Ubuntu forums will be on the top of the search results.

In one evening, you will have learned how to run and configure Virtualbox (very easy) and install an "easy" Linux distro. And you will have your playground ready.

Now just look around, try the environment. Open a console and start trying some commands. Find yourself a little project that will force you to look under the hood : setting up a basic LAMP webserver for example. That will teach you how to use package repositories to install new software, where the different components of these software end up in the system folders, how to run command lines, etc. Give it a few evenings.

Then pick up two-three other distributions with different Windows Managers and reinstall your VM (or make a new one) with them. To see the differences. Manjaro with KDE. Fedora XFCE. Endeavour i3 (an amazing Arch based distro but with a very steep learning curve. For later).

Just fool around in a VM. Don't take that seriously. Explore Linux. Give up. Come back to it. Nobody cares, just have fun and try. You won't know if you like it unless you play with it.

Then if you fall in love replace Windows with your favorite distro and run Windows in a QEMU virtual machine... :P

You've posted this in the wrong community; this community is for memes about both cracked and uncracked eggs. Might want to post this in a different community.