this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2023
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Programmer Humor

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[–] captainjaneway@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Gentleman should be the name of the system. We need exquisite types:

  • int: numeral
  • boolean: veritas
  • char: littera
  • string: verbum
  • double: fractio
  • struct: aedificium
numeral x = 3; // pronounced "noo-mer-al eggs is thadeeEEEE" 
[–] Biscuit@kbin.social 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
  • array: matrica
  • loop: circulus
  • function: officium
  • thread: filum
  • byte: minima
  • debug: rectificare
[–] Noodlez@programming.dev 4 points 1 year ago
  • byte: octoplex
[–] marcos@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That post was going so well... And then you go and use the equality symbol for assignment like a savage.

[–] Noodlez@programming.dev 10 points 1 year ago

numeral x 3 est.

[–] jayrhacker@kbin.social 4 points 1 year ago

In VIM mode, veritas

[–] garrettw87@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

“aedificium” got me

[–] Tenthrow@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago (4 children)

This is the best programming joke I have seen in at least a week.

[–] i_love_FFT@lemmy.ml 12 points 1 year ago
[–] sebastiancarlos@lemmy.sdf.org 9 points 1 year ago

I beg you pardon?

[–] Colombo@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago
[–] 4am@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Iterative at best

[–] Estinos@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Made me laugh, but I can't help but think that's exactly what so many abstractions in OOP languages are doing. NullObject, anyone?

[–] vrek@programming.dev 7 points 1 year ago

This reminds me of the Rockstar programming language. It started as a joke about headhunters looking for "Rockstar programmers". The creator ended up making a complete programming language where the program's code could be sung as a 80s power ballad.

https://codewithrockstar.com/

[–] TheLurker@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Yeah, I already hate myself but I'm going to implement this. 🤣

[–] greyhathero@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do Not Adieu, a play in two acts.

Romeo, a young man with a remarkable patience. Juliet, a likewise young woman of remarkable grace. Ophelia, a remarkable woman much in dispute with Hamlet. Hamlet, the flatterer of Andersen Insulting A/S.

                Act I: Hamlet's insults and flattery.

                Scene I: The insulting of Romeo.

[Enter Hamlet and Romeo]

Hamlet: You lying stupid fatherless big smelly half-witted coward! You are as stupid as the difference between a handsome rich brave hero and thyself! Speak your mind!

You are as brave as the sum of your fat little stuffed misused dusty old rotten codpiece and a beautiful fair warm peaceful sunny summer's day. You are as healthy as the difference between the sum of the sweetest reddest rose and my father and yourself! Speak your mind!

You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and the difference between a big mighty proud kingdom and a horse. Speak your mind.

Speak your mind!

[Exit Romeo]

                Scene II: The praising of Juliet.

[Enter Juliet]

Hamlet: Thou art as sweet as the sum of the sum of Romeo and his horse and his black cat! Speak thy mind!

[Exit Juliet]

                Scene III: The praising of Ophelia.

[Enter Ophelia]

Hamlet:

Thou art as beautiful as the difference between Romeo and the square of a huge green peaceful tree. Speak thy mind!

Thou art as lovely as the product of a large rural town and my amazing bottomless embroidered purse. Speak thy mind!

Thou art as loving as the product of the bluest clearest sweetest sky and the sum of a squirrel and a white horse. Thou art as beautiful as the difference between Juliet and thyself. Speak thy mind!

[Exeunt Ophelia and Hamlet]

                Act II: Behind Hamlet's back.

                Scene I: Romeo and Juliet's conversation.

[Enter Romeo and Juliet]

Romeo: Speak your mind. You are as worried as the sum of yourself and the difference between my small smooth hamster and my nose. Speak your mind!

Juliet: Speak YOUR mind! You are as bad as Hamlet! You are as small as the difference between the square of the difference between my little pony and your big hairy hound and the cube of your sorry little codpiece. Speak your mind!

[Exit Romeo]

                Scene II: Juliet and Ophelia's conversation.

[Enter Ophelia]

Juliet: Thou art as good as the quotient between Romeo and the sum of a small furry animal and a leech. Speak your mind!

Ophelia: Thou art as disgusting as the quotient between Romeo and twice the difference between a mistletoe and an oozing infected blister! Speak your mind!

[Exeunt]

[–] lynx@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago

For anyone wondering why the shakespearelang hello world does not work, it uses instead of ' in line 13. You can find correct code here: https://courses.cs.washington.edu/courses/cse142/20wi/exploration/hello

[–] Clanky@vlemmy.net 1 points 1 year ago

I prefer “good show” for True and “bad show” for False

[–] dylanTheDeveloper@lemmy.world -5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Im casting semen from the butthole object

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