this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

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[–] mipadaitu@lemmy.world 170 points 1 month ago

Oh fuck... It's so stupid it's smart.

[–] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 117 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I don’t trust the liberal science agenda so I did my own research. Using some back-of-the-napkin math and my telescope, I’m now blind from looking at the sun through a telescope. This is being transcribed by my trad wife. My results:

2 > 1

This one checks out, folks.

[–] CosmicTurtle0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 1 month ago (3 children)

You must be a terrorist because that's MUSLIM MATH! Those are not Christian numbers and feel it necessary to report this comment to the FBI, the Federal Biblical Investigators.

[–] Archer@lemmy.world 36 points 1 month ago
[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How's this instead: II > I

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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What, you don't believe in the Nemesis hypothesis?

Because that would bring it up to... hang on, let me get my calculator...

Two stars in the solar system.

[–] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fascinating proposal, professor. Thankfully I can adjust my equations quite easily:

2 ≥ 2

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] alquicksilver@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

There is not a single thing about this comment chain that doesn't bring me joy.

[–] Dragonstaff@leminal.space 6 points 1 month ago

Thank you for your service.

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[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 70 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

As someone who worked in a gas station for 24 years..

sigh

I’d do it. I’d suck it up. I’d make some damn good friends along the way and then I’d never maintain those friendships and feel guilty for the rest of rest of my life. “Just call him, dipshit. He’s going through a divorce! Just go fishing! Pleaaassse! Ok, here goes. Tomorrow.”

Always tomorrow.

[–] whelk@lemm.ee 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is one of the most fascinating comments I've ever encountered on Lemmy

[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You’re fascinating. 😘

[–] whelk@lemm.ee 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

We should be best friends. 👊

[–] geogle@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago
[–] SpermHowitzer@sh.itjust.works 28 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 68 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I have no idea how I ended up here. Swear to god I was on the post about the trolley, saving people, and small talk. No shit. Never even seen this post.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 28 points 1 month ago

This happened to me once too. The Lemmy gods brought you here. You are now a part of the meme

[–] Wogi@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (3 children)

As God as my witness I thought turkeys could fly. We've all been there.

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[–] TinyShonk@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

I saw that post right below this one.

[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

And now I’ve posted it in the correct location.

[–] WolfLink@sh.itjust.works 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

No this post was the correct location. Don’t second guess yourself. You were always meant to be here!

[–] pendingdeletion@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 55 points 1 month ago (3 children)

You got me. Had to whatever the thought equivalent of double take is.

[–] don@lemm.ee 18 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

If i had fallen for it, i would have had a quarter ponder :)

[–] Boggy@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Had yourself a thinkythink

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[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 52 points 1 month ago

I love this because even though I read the words, I interpreted it to mean something else for a second. (atoms and galaxy) Be careful when you read things and don't assume you know something.

[–] dQw4w9WgXcQ@lemm.ee 36 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Not if you count Taylor Swift

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[–] mokazemi@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 1 month ago

Mmm... Yeah!

[–] hate2bme@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is the joke that there is only one star in our solar system? The sun?

[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

yes, ... and only 2 hydrogen atoms in a molecule of water (H2O)

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Second time i see this, still funny :)

[–] kamen@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago

Made me think for a second.

[–] SerotoninSwells@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (8 children)
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[–] blockheadjt@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago
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