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Yep, that's me. When I still actively used reddit, I felt this with every message, was always afraid I was off the mark, or didn't read the room, or said something wrong or ignorant.
I just turned off notifications and ignored my karma count to just post through it. Though, I usually said things that either never got any votes, or that people seemed to generally agree with. And I was relieved whenever I did notice the numbers going up instead of down, and occasionally worked up the courage to check responses and continue conversations, but usually nothing.
This has really not changed since moving to Lemmy, and really just persists through every website. It sucks, I mostly just don't comment.
Maybe at work. Getting an email at work means... well, work.
Anybody else instinctively clench when they hear the Slack notification sound?
Yes.
I think I have a mental disorder where if people online are angry at me I actually start introspecting a lot rather than blowing it off. Sometimes I have something I want to say anyway and emotionally prepare to eat it.