I don't know what is more dissappointing: the lack of creativity in how these murders are covered up or that Russia is in such a sorry state that the powers that be see no need to bother.
this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2023
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The point isn’t to cover it up (well). It’s a warning to others who might question those in power.
What this particular Vlad did to earn a defenestration - I have no idea. But no one else will try it anytime soon if they’re also susceptible to gravity-accelerated blunt force trauma.
It might have simply been a matter of under-performing. It’s been a long three days, and Ukraine still has Nazis, after all.
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Yea the comments are always the same tired defenestrate or hand-rail jokes on these articles but honestly it’s just sad to see that accountability has fallen so far that the despotic government of Russia doesn’t even try making these look believable
It's like a serial killer signature at this point. They want people to know.
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They know they don't need to, it sends the message perfectly.
They were creative!
This was a third story window, not a second story one.
Russians could make bank with a hand rail industry.
Just like the Empire in Star Wars.
Sounds suspiciously like forbidden western technology. Throw him out the window!
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Russian windows are just giant holes in the wall with no glass and every room has random banana peels thrown around. It's the only explanation. Unless....
No "unless", that's exactly what it is... unless you want to trip and fall out of a window.
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A useful word for situations like this is defenestrate. It means to throw a person or thing out of a window.
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Very surprised that he didn't shoot himself in the back of the head before he accidentally fell out of the window.
before
Nope, the blood pattern clearly shows he shot himself after he hit the ground. Clearly, this man went above and beyond to kill himself. A Russian patriot.
World heavyweight champion of suicide
Russian windows seem to be nearly as dangerous as American guns.
As an architectural professional, I kinda want to skim over Russian building codes on the off-chance that they just have really shitty practice around fall protection at windows, and all of our jokes about it misunderstand the situtation after all.
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Windows seems to be a severe infrastructure problem in modern Russia.
Interesting that’s it’s an ally and not a foe - that suggests (if it’s not a true accident) that the top is beginning to jostle for position.
That, or fate loves irony.
Must not have been a good enough ally.
That, or more interestingly, maybe Putin really is losing control in Russia.
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Was banana peel (/russian accent)
It’s like headline madlibs.
Vladimir _______, Putin _____ found dead after falling from ________ window.
Why is it always such low windows?
I think it's like a villain calling card. As a whole this war has been great for consolidating power
... was found dead after falling from a daylight basement window
It's about sending a message. Also a lot of Soviet era buildings don't have working elevators, so why drag the body higher than necessary?
'Cause they have to be identifiable right away ... not a splatter stain that takes days/weeks to identifiy.
Gotta get that message out quick.
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Marvel just should've called her "black window", it's more realistic that way.
For a while there I thought "moved to Belarus" was going to become the new "fell from a window", but I guess they've decided to stick with tradition.
My mind read “Putin (fin)ally found dead…” and I was really excited for a moment.
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Seems to be a big problem in Russia, they should get those windows checked or something...
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I really don't want the Russians to win in Ukraine, but if they were to outfit all their troops with windows instead of bullets... just sayin'.
Falling out windows seem like a leading cause of death in russia, just after going on jaunts across the border in Ukraine. And both are easily preventable.
Defenestration is a funny word. Mostly because it doesn't sound like a way of killing someone.
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I know kids fresh out of college that make more than he did.
One of these days they'll get it: To fly one must merely not hit the ground.
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“Four Putin allies/suspected enemies/whatever found dead after falling in the same bathtub and drowning. Putin’s surviving allies maintain, ‘This is fine.’”
"Falling"
Oopsies
How "Unexpected"!
Oh no, anyway...
Every sane Russian better avoid stairs and windows.
Here’s to hoping he invites Donnie shitty drawers for tea on the balcony someday who knows.
gravity, the bane of Russian's existence
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