this post was submitted on 20 Apr 2025
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i’m constantly told to give up on my goals. they’re not even unrealistic, i don’t want to be a big, giant unicorn who saves the world or something.

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[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Every 'goal' my family gave me and then forced me into pursuing?

Sure, they praised me when I accomplished those things.

Every goal I actually chose for myself, and achieved?

At best, absolutely no help of any kind when I'd ask them for help, general constant dissuasion and negging, and then after I achieve those goals, massive, massive passive aggressive jealously and constant belittling.

I now live several states away, don't communicate with them, and have finally been able to establish a sense of self, and self-esteem, based around my own assesment of what are good traits and goals, instead of basing them on trying to please incompetent bullies.

...

If your goals are, as you say in another post, learning how to make a vidro game, learning to draw, learning basic programming/web design...

These are literally all goals that pretty much most people with sufficient spare time and diligence could figure out the basics of and even become decently competent at with a few years of time... not even in a formal education setting, though that could likely help.

Your goals are extremely reasonable, your family is being ridiculous.

Are you guaranteed to become wealthy via pursuit of these goals? No, of course not.

But you aren't guaranteed that in most other careers or lines of work either.

If you don't already have gobs of money and/or influential connections... chances are, you never will.

Unless you are like abadoning a fairly solid career path that you're already significantly time/money invested in, and just completely abandoning all means of keeping yourself able to eat and sleep indoors for the full time pursuit of hobbies...

Then no, there's nothing wrong with wanting to learn more skills.