this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2025
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See here. Basically, creating a relay for the AT protocol is extremely costly and only possible for big tech companies.
Thank you!
TL;DR, the relay bit works as a completely connected network topology, and has the associated quadratic growth issues, which renders it, like you said, hard to host.
Also nasty: Direct messages are just not federated.
Other things are or were at the time of writing janky, but nothing else is quite that egregious. The author is working on a separate project, and recommends this idea as a solution for portable identity on ActivityPub; here's what "object capability" means in the context.