originally seen on the fediverse here: https://elekk.xyz/@coriander/114114387547043884
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this post was submitted on 06 Mar 2025
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Yes an old joke for our times. About NEWSPAPERS.
To be honest, every time I lunch Lemmy I'm hoping for a "Trump found dead" post to be on the top.
Trump found dead, circumstances not suspicious says Kremlin.
Fell out of a 7th floor window in the White House.
Why would the Kremlin want him dead?
He disagreed with the "voluntary" annexation.
Putin just kept saying "Perhaps you think you are being treated unfairly" when he complained about it.
Choking on Putin's junk is not suspicious, plus it's how Trump wanted to go!
Something similar, I wake up and look out for fresh memes of his assassination. But until now I remain disappointed.
I'm in a better situation: I'd be happy with Trump or Elon. So, 50% better odds, however small they might be.
OTOH, Trump could just keel over one of these days, leaving us with President Vance shudder. I mean, President Couch Fucker has a nice ring, and all, but every single time that guy opens his mouth, the more I want to punch him.
I dunno. The list of guys who deserve a sword missile is getting pretty long. Moscow Mitch, Vance, Trump, Elon. Any of them would be a happy day.
Wish Granted
TRUMP DEAD. Vance accuse the "Radical Left" of assasination. Martial Law has been declared.
c/monkeypaw
The Second American Civil War is one of the good timelines though.
In the bad ones, no one bothers to fight back.
vance does not have the anything to be a threatening dictator
Senselessly.
You’re right, I’ll fix it:
[BRO] stops by the [iPAD STAND] every day, scans the [INTERNET], doesn't buy the [IPAD]. One day the vendor asks what he's up to.
[BRO] says: "looking for an obituary."
Vendor says "those are towards the back of the [RSS FEED], [RIZZLER]."
[BRO] says: "not the one I'm looking for, [BITCH]."
Okay boomer
Good try, but already outdated