this post was submitted on 29 Jan 2025
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[โ€“] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 2 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah my parents definitely tried, and a lot of their failures weren't their fault, but others were. I'm 30 now so I'm long past the stage of blaming them for shit just to blame them. They had a lot of issues individually and even more as a couple.

So yeah, if you have preexisting trauma or mental health issues it's probably a good idea to get help for them earlier rather than later into being a parent. If you've tried everything and nothing works and your kid swears they're trying too start looking for new things, but also love and accept your child failure and all. And dont let your love for your kid slowly fade and eventually disown them. It will ruin your relationship with all your kids even if you don't realize it, but I suspect that's not a thing most parents are at risk of doing lol.

[โ€“] victorz@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

Very good advice. I think it sounds like you came out of all this with a lot of insight along with the inevitable damage/baggage. And that's honestly a bit of a win. That's awesome.