this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
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Yes, because if the nonabusive parent can find a nonabusive partner, that gives a kid a chance with a true loving home and a way to learn prosocial behaviors and how to have a truly respectful and loving relationship. You can't change that they have an abusive parent, but you can help them learn how to not accept that abuse and not perpetuate it.
Like if I leave my husband who hit me, I'm showing my daughter to do that if her boyfriend ever hits her. If I stay, I'm just teaching her to endure abuse. It's the same if Dad does it, too - he's a role model as well. And further, this excuse is the exact one men DM me before asking to cheat on their wives ('shes crazy and im just staying for the kids') so I frankly have zero tolerance for it. Grow a backbone and some morals and get a divorce. You're not helping your kids, you're helping yourself.