Not The Onion

12262 readers

1024 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

kescusay@lemmy.world

213

A definitive list of woke and non-woke foods (thespinoff.co.nz)

submitted 6 months ago by Venator@lemmy.nz to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

52 comments fedilink hide all child comments

In announcing changes to the school lunches programme, David Seymour said kids would no longer be served ‘woke’ foods. To clear up any confusion, The Spinoff has compiled a guide to the wokeness levels of some common food items.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Banana = NOT WOKE

[–] boredtortoise@lemm.ee 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Too confusing for computer smh

Apologies for the oversight. Let's adjust the woke meal plan accordingly:

Woke Meal Plan (Revised):

Breakfast: Avocado toast with quinoa sprinkles (Approx. 350 calories

Snack: Apple slices with almond butter (Approx. 200 calories)

Lunch: Quinoa salad with chickpeas, mixed greens, and avocado (Approx. 450 calories)

Snack: Hummus with carrot sticks (Approx. 150 calories)

Dinner: Tofu stir-fry with a side of non-dairy milk (Approx. 400 calories)

Total calories: Approximately 1550 calories

"appy slicey not woke"

Snack: Sliced cucumber with almond butter (Approx. 200 calories)

[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 4 points 6 months ago

Well done, much more woke 😂