this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2024
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Autism

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How do you work with the social life in college and not feel worth less than others? (lemmy.world)
submitted 7 months ago by greencactus@lemmy.world to c/autism@lemmy.world
15 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Hey y'all,

I'm a 19 year old psychology student in college (with the goal of becoming a therapist) and have been diagnosed last summer with autism (low support needs).

I think the fact that so many of my peers go to parties, drink and have fun, while it is too overstimulating for me, feels really bad. I can't go to a party without earplugs, beer tastes awful to me (and coffee as well - way too intense for my taste), as soon as there's blood in a movie I feel unconformable, and it just feels that everyone is able to do thing easily which for me are a real struggle.

I'm in a relationship, and my gf seems to be able to do all these things easier than me. Asides from the fact that she also has better grades than me, I just feel resentment and sadness that people around me seem to better than me in so many aspects. Of course we should focus on our strengths, and that we shouldn't compare ourselves to others. But in the end I still feel resentment that people around me are just able to do so many more things than me, and that things considered normal in our society are a struggle, if not outright impossible, for autistic people.

So I'd love some input on how y'all cope with the reality of not being able to participate in social life to the same extent as other people.

Thanks!

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[โ€“] biddy@feddit.nl 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I can speak as someone who thought they couldn't do parties. Parties are incredibly intense, and can be the best or worst experience of your life depending on the smallest details. Eventually you will learn how to party best for you, what substances to take, what to wear, where to stand and what to do, which parties are just not going to work for you. Keep trying new things, but also if you're not feeling it, take some time out or just leave.

I think the older you get, the more you realize that everyone has imposter syndrome and anxiety all the time, but you just have to fake it until you make it. If you pretend everything is fine, it usually turns out fine.

[โ€“] greencactus@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago

Sorry for the late reply - thank you for your reply though! I appreciate it a lot.

Especially your last paragraph really hit a spot :) You're right, we all just try to fight our way through life - and it is easy to forget that others struggle with it as well. I'll try to keep it in mind. Thank you for your input!