this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
103 points (85.5% liked)

Asklemmy

43821 readers
1152 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy ๐Ÿ”

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Cloak@lemmy.ml
mekhos@lemmy.ml
tmpod@lemmy.pt
14specks@lemmy.ml
103
Why do people keep asking where I'm from? (lemmy.ca)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by Shampoo_Bottle@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
114 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Up until I started working, I didn't really encounter that question. When I did start working, people started asking me that question.

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Where are your grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Ok, where are your great grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

It's irritating sometimes. I just want to exist, do my job and go home, like anyone else. Once is ok, twice is odd, three times is weird, and the fourth time is a pattern.

The only accent that I might have would probably be from Newfoundland, Canada, as I grew up with a lot of people from there. I also talk too fast sometimes.

Have you had similar experiences, and if so, how did you handle it? Can fast speech patterns cause this? Why do random people care so much?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] calypsopub@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I was in my 50s before I started understanding this stuff. Before that, I was married to a very gregarious man who was my social buffer. I could hide behind his small talk. But then he passed away and I was left twisting in the wind until I started to learn how to make small talk. Often I just ask myself what my husband would have said.

[โ€“] monsterpiece42@reddthat.com 2 points 9 months ago

I was late ~~diagnosed~~ discovered as well. Early 30s.

I have a decent mask built up but it is really exhausting so I try not to use it if I don't have to.

On thing I've found about small talk is, people love to be told what day it is. Like they ask you "how's it going?" and you say back "well it sure is a Tuesday!" It's actually amusing how well it works.

[โ€“] Rozz@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 9 months ago

That's good advice for someone who has a more outgoing partner who knows how to small talk.