this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2023
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Doubts and self hate (lemmy.ca)
submitted 1 year ago by Seigest@lemmy.ca to c/asexual@lemmy.world
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I've been having a dought. It's a small nagging one but it's there.

I've been working a lot with my therapist on self hate issues, but I can acknowledge them.

I realized I can never really be in any kind of physical relationship with somone because of this. I'm repulsed by myself and perhaps my asexuality is just a result of that.

I wonder if I am so repulsed by myself that the idea of me being with anyone is rejected because of the "me" part and not how I feel towards others. Where some may think "I want to kiss that person" I can't bare the thought if subjecting somone to me in that way. And therefore the thought is gross.

Does anyone else deal with this? Any advice?

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[–] Seigest@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago

Thank you. Your "set in stone" point makes me wonder if my asexuality is wrapped up in my identity. And that may be another thing I'd need to reflect on.

Fortunately, I am patient enough to wait amd see how things go. Not that I have much of a choice.