This hurts me so badly... :( I've lost all of my 20s to depression, extreme social isolation and emptiness. My 30th birthday was last month, and I wonder is there's something to be recovered from me

[–] lazyslacker@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's nothing you can do to change what happened in the past but you can treat every new day as a new opportunity to try to self actualize, following whatever path to do that seems best to you.

[–] nossaquesapao@lemmy.eco.br 1 points 1 year ago

Thank you for your words. it's a lot harder in practice, though. Everything changes, and the way people interact with us changes too. My first approach was trying to live out the youth experiences I missed, but I realized everything is different and it's impossible. It's something still hard for me to deal with, but i'm trying to find new paths. It's just hard not to find myself lying down in tears when I think about these things.

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago

I spent a solid chunk of my 20s being an alcoholic in a desperate attempt to hide from myself. Late 20s (like 28-29) I finally moved to the right place, put in an exhausting amount of work into finding local connections, I'm doing a lot better now. Eat healthy, do some kind of physical activity if you can, see if there are any groups near you that share in any of your interests, don't expect it to be solved right away it takes time. Enjoy being at the early side of old people "I just truly don't give a fuck" mentality because that can carry you past a lot of social anxiety. 16 yr old at the MTG table says you have a garbage deck? IDGAF, give them a "I'm old enough to fuck your mom" glare through your beginners crows feet. Bond with the people who think that kid is a dipshit. Being in my 30s now is way better than my 20s I'm happier and healthier (save for COVID giving me fucking asthma never used to need an inhaler)

[–] Anamana@feddit.de 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

In your 30s you can still do almost anything, so yeah :)

I went skijumping last year, which was a childhood dream of mine.

[–] nossaquesapao@lemmy.eco.br 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thank you for that droplet of motivation. How was it when you jumped?

[–] Anamana@feddit.de 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I thought I was gonna die when I looked down the hill and let go of the plank. The jump itself was actually way more controlled then I expected, but I also didn't fly that long obv ;) was able to try two different hills, but not the biggest one.

Fun fact: Most people in the group were 40+ years old and they were flying like crazy haha

[–] LordAmplifier@pawb.social 1 points 1 year ago

Same. I'm 3 years younger, but depression, anxiety, and the resulting lack of any kind of sense of mission have made me so miserable. The lockdowns tore down the resemblance of a social network I had, and now it feels like there's nothing left. I'm trying to get better and to change, turn my life around, but it's hard. I don't have any encouraging words. Just know that you're not alone in feeling like that <3