No Stupid Questions
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"Compassion for people's emotional investment and their intellectual passion" - this is covered by "empathy, and it's incredibly difficult to practice, so my sincere congratulations for working at it.
With everybody existing on a spectrum, you not pleasing people without limits will make you an a****** at some point. The limit is yours to figure out because you understand yourself best.
For me, I help people until or unless it is painfully obvious that they are taking advantage of a situation. I don't personally mind someone taking a little advantage. But once it's clear that they will not stop taking, I draw boundaries.
I think most people have different limits on how much they are willing to give and take. And you get to determine your own limits.
You set an initial boundary for yourself of how much you are willing to give and take and then remain consistently aware of progressive circumstances so that you can adjust your boundaries as necessary to your own health and well-being.
If you still feel good about yourself and you aren't hurting anybody else, great.
It is much easier to set static boundaries and adjust as necessary than immediately shouldering a dynamic boundary that changes every minute with each situation.