this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2023
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I feel like I give help easily but I don't feel ok asking. How do you become ok with asking for help? I have no idea what conversations that include this even sound like. In my mind I come across as begging and losing connection with the person or people I ask. How can I think about this differently?

Edit: a little more context, although this applies generally I think. I recently got surgery. I have enough help at home to get by, but it would be nice I suppose if a friend wanted to help out in some way too while I recover. I'm not exactly sure what kind of help that would entail, maybe cleaning or cooking or even just visiting. But I struggle with asking for help in even "normal" circumstances, like moving, or a major project, or even just emotional support.

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[โ€“] Mothra@mander.xyz 7 points 1 year ago

As a rule of thumb, I never ask for help if I consider I'd be annoyed if I were in the other person's shoes. This means I tend to ask help more frequently for things that require explaining and understanding stuff, and will rarely ask for help with physical tasks if it's safe for me to do those myself.