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Is there anything good in Hexbear? (lemmy.one)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by DrPop@lemmy.one to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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The few conversations I've had there have been unproductive and inflammatory. While even in other instances when I've said something someone disagreed with they would at least support their statement. Also no one would tell me why the "Confused Unga Bunga" meme is racist but they keep accusing me of it. I'm all for open discussions but even the comments there are so angry and toxic.

Edit: I'm reading every comment and taking everything people said and considering all sides. My stance on the phrase has changed but I am still hesitant about giving hexbear a chance. I'll sleep on it though.

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[–] AOCapitulator@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

if you're legit and you want to grow and reflect, from now on in this thread, only ask questions and do not argue, digest what you read and learn for a while, and then you can argue like, tomorrow or whenever, if you still want to. anything else would be reactive and unhelpful for your growth, and likely result in you digging in and growing stubborn on the issue

For real, this is not going to be healthy if you keep posting at this rate, if you're being genuine

I was replying to your reply in another thread and thought Id check your post history only to see youre in like 5 interactions at once, thats now how you self crit or reflect chief

[–] DrPop@lemmy.one 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You may be right, I just felt the strong need to defend my reasoning. I'm just trying to learn and I'm reading every comment and considering my response and even went back and changed some of my statements that looking back are dumb.

[–] AOCapitulator@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You don't have to fix everything right this second, in fact trying to is likely to break everything worse. If you really do reflect and grow here, you will be welcomed and encouraged, but not if you go down swinging on a hill you "felt a strong need to defend". I am not saying that in any way disparagingly, I've been there. You may not be wrong for feeling this way, but acting on it may very well be a mistake in retrospect

If you decide to take my advice, edit your post here to say: I've been given a lot to reflect on, I'm going to disengage and do that" or similar (include the word disengage though) and then no one will pile on, and may even reach out