Doesn't really help with the reputation among non-users, but I found myself much more comfortable with the platform and seeing dramatically less of the "Mao did nothing wrong" kind of extreme views once the instance I joined decided to defederate lemmygrad, maybe recommend an instance that does that? Lemmy.ml is also kinda concerning but at least there the typical user isn't really much of a problem, it's just the moderation policy there, so I just try to avoid the politics and news communities from that instance.
In the long run, I imagine that some instances will just end up setting up their own forked versions, I know the owner of my instance has been talking about doing that although i don't really know how that's going or how likely such a thing is to work out.