Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
I regret nothing. Say what you want.
Edit: I just saw the two typos. If you find them, you're welcome to keep them.
At uni I did a lot of my Java coursework in notepad, then I’d have to take it into a computer lab on a floppy, tar it and upload it to a unix terminal so it could be emailed to the professor. Java syntax with only the command line compiler is not fun.
As long as you don't use Microsoft Word we can be friends
What about the libre office version?
Bonus points if you're saving it as an .odt and still producing a validly executable file of some kind
You're weird, but we can be friends if you want.
If you're not writing it all down on paper and then punching holes in cards, you're doing it all wrong
text editor application that came with Ubuntu
nano
shivers
I'm probably in the minority but I think it's fantastic! No extra baggage, super quick to work with, and it does syntax highlighting pretty well!
Nah man, I'm with you, nano is no nonsense get shit done editor. It might not have advanced features but I'm not an advanced man.
I also love it. It was my go-to back when I had to walk inexperienced sysadmins through configuring stuff, in my tech support days. I really appreciate all the commands being listed at the bottom.
The person that codes in MS paint
This feels a little bit like Brainfuck tbh.
For what it’s worth, I can think of one thing that would make brainfuck even worse: Instead of using 8 arbitrary characters (it only uses > < + - . , ] and [ for every instruction) for the coding, use the 8 most common letters of the alphabet. Since it ignores all other characters, all of your comments would need to be done without those 8 letters.
For example, “Hello World” in brainfuck is the following:
++++++++[>++++[>++>+++>+++>+<<<<-]>+>+>->>+[<]<-]>>.>---.+++++++..+++.>>.<-.<.+++.------.--------.>>+.>++.
If we instead transposed those 8 instructions onto the 8 most common letters of the alphabet, it would look more like this:
eeeeeeeeaneeeeaneeneeeneeenesssstonenentnneasostonnIntttIeeeeeeeIIeeeInnIstIsIeeeIttttttIttttttttInneIneeI
NANO is life.
Nano is fine. But Micro is a worthwhile upgrade: https://micro-editor.github.io/
That boy is gonna be a murderer
One word: ed
?
Ed is the most user unfriendly text editor ever created.
?
It is a text editor from the 50s or 60s, so right off the nat you aren't getting a product you're at all familiar with. Its been a while since I cracked it open but from memory you can only view one line of code at a time. You have to specify the line of code that you want to view, the commands are esoteric, and there is no help available in the application itself. As I recall it was pretty much immediately replaced with better editors, such as og vi.
Its sort of like programming in sed. Sure, you can, but why?
From Wikipedia:
Known for its terseness, ed, compatible with teletype terminals like Teletype Model 33, gives almost no visual feedback, and has been called (by Peter H. Salus) "the most user-hostile editor ever created", even when compared to the contemporary (and notoriously complex) TECO. For example, the message that ed will produce in case of error, and when it wants to make sure the user wishes to quit without saving, is "?". It does not report the current filename or line number, or even display the results of a change to the text, unless requested. Older versions (c. 1981) did not even ask for confirmation when a quit command was issued without the user saving changes.
I write all my code on paper and use OCR to convert it. It almost works sometimes.
I like SublimeText for everything unless a quick edit at the CLI with Vim.
Gedit was my main text editor for years. I also used it for work. It has all the basic features that you need for coding. For everything else I use the terminal.
Notepad.exe has been my daily driver for anything that doesn't need a compiler for decades.
You mean the one that didn't even do proper line endings until recently?
And would save in non-UTF8 format by default. No idea, if they changed that by now.
Code in MS Word because it handles tabs correctly, unlike all code editors.
Tab means "move to the next tabstop", not "advance a fixed amount".
(I don't do it, I'm not THAT insane)
Me: hits return.
Word: "Sure, here, a new line. I already indented it for you, same as the one before. Like a good IDE."
Me: "That's nice of you, Word, but I want this one to be indented one tab stop less than the line before." Hits delete.
Word: "Delete, you say? Sure, back to the line before."
Me: "No, no! Just delete one tab! Maybe, if I select the line and hit dele..."
Word: "Why of course!"
Me: "Shit, it's gone. Undo! Hmm... Move the thingy here on top?"
Word: "Move all the lines you say? No problem!"
Me: "Nvm, I'll just indent everything by hand with spaces."