this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2024
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Asklemmy

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[–] SirDerpy@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

US:

A common murderer-for-hire is difficult to hire because they'll probably take your money and disappear. A muderer-for-hire that won't get caught is impossible to hire because they don't advertise to the common person.

If you want the full package then it'll cost you five to ten years: Commit a somewhat violent crime to avoid being sentenced to minimum security prison. You'll have lots of time. There's not much to do except be violent and learn whatever you want from other inmates and books. Choose your friends wisely.

[–] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Ask Tiger King πŸ˜‚

[–] Mobiledecay@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

eBay has them for cheap using the Buy it now option. ☺️

[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But then the victim isn't included in the price and costs twice as much.

[–] Mobiledecay@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's too late! Now I'm screwed! 😭😭😭

[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 2 points 2 months ago

Call your credit company and block the transaction.

Remind them that if they don't, you have a hitman awaiting a victim.

[–] Mrkawfee@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

Just contact the ICA and ask for Agent 47.

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