Teachers: "We're doing the best we can. It's all the parents' fault for raising these no-learning-ass little monsters. We've tried literally everything, and there is NOTHING WE COULD POSSIBLY DO to rescue the nation from this nightmare of continually stupider people. None of it is our fault, and if you even think about suggesting that we should be held accountable for our job performance, you are actually evil."
Also teachers: "If you kicked us an extra twenty or thirty grand per year, you'd really start to see a lot of improvement."